Kitchen Roomba

Being a well-known foodie, I've eaten in some pretty swank restaurants. I'm not trying to be elitist in saying that - it simply sets the stage for one of my post-entrée gripes, the crumb-sweeper.

It's not that I necessarily disdain the removal of food particles from the white linen tablecloth. On the contrary - the flotsam and jetsam of dinner on the table is my fault. If I was a little better at hitting my pie hole, there wouldn't be anything there in need of sweeping.

No, my complaint is the little show that accompanies using the implement - wrist snaps, zooming motions, masterful sweeping gestures reminiscent of a worldly flamenco dancer- just to collect my crumbs. C'mon, man.

I'd much prefer this kitchen roomba. Looking a bit like an updated version of the robot from Lost in Space, the Mini Robot Vacuum could zip here and there, sucking up the small morsels that falls from our trembling forks in mid-foodgasm.

Do you need it? Probably not. Do you WANT it? Yes, you do!