Rick Perry - All Asshat, No Cattle

Remember when Texas governor Rick "Goodhair" Perry threatened to secede from the United States of America rather than continue to have the federales mess with Texas?

I believe he turned down nearly $556 million in Obama administration stimulus funds to be applied to Texas unemployment benefits. There may have been some hitchin' of his britches and nutsack adjustin' as he hopped from tea party to tea party, posturin' and demagogin' and bein' all "we can care for our own in Tejas."

Yeah...Texas is asking the feds for a $170 million loan so they can keep paying those unemployment benefits. So much for independence.

Media outlets are reporting that Texas is expected to request $650 million in funds. I know that Texas schools are all about that there readin', writin', and 'rithmetic, so surely they know that's about $100 million more than they turned down initially.

Maybe they are going to secede, and the $650 million is like key money for a new apartment. Once they get the cash, they'll change all the locks and stop returning our calls.

Don't mess with Texas.

Image by StevenM_61 on flickr