John Hiatt - Feels Like Rain

Just sitting here while a Ubuntu upgrade chugs along, and this came up on the old music box, so I thought I'd share.

Michael Moore on Immigration and Goldman Sachs

Michael Moore was on Larry King Live the other night in what can only be described as an irrelevance-off.

I do need to give Moore mad props for this quip:

"... any illegal immigrant they catch in Arizona, they should let him keep doing his job because he's adding to the economy. For every one they catch, they should send one Goldman Sachs guy to Mexico."

Porn Stars Decry Piracy

Two observations - having Ron Jeremy articulate your position doesn't really increase the credibility, and judging by how these performers look, it's no wonder amateur porn is on the rise.

Give Mom The Gift of Masturbation for Mother's Day

Wow. I've heard of targeted marketing before, but the thought of giving your mother a DC-powered sex vibe is one forward-leaning way to say, "Thanks for helping me with that math homework, mom!"

Perhaps if she had owned something to relieve the stress you caused during your teen years, she wouldn't need a Magic Hand Massager now, Skippy. Ever think of that? Where the hell was Dad?

You're always a day late and a dollar short. And eat something, for God's sake. You're practically skin and bones.

Via Geekologie

Don't Boycott AriZona Iced Tea!

AriZona Iced Tea would like you to know that they're based in New York, thank you very much, so when you're looking to punish the jackholes that are behind the "May I see your papers, please?" immigration legislation, leave AriZona out of it.

You are permitted to enjoy a refreshing AriZona Iced Tea while protesting, which I would find deliciously ironic.

Apparently George Lopez used AriZona Iced Tea in a joke, and for the first time ever, people though something Lopez said was actually funny enough to share with friends. What with Twitter and everything, the humor spread like an Arizona wild fire, much to the dismay of AriZona Iced Tea, who felt the need to issue a press release to tell the world they're from Long Island, dammit.

There are other companies based in Arizona that are fair game, though. U-Haul, Cold Stone Creamery, PF Chang's - a partial list is located here.

As far as AriZona Iced Tea, try the ginseng tea. It'll give you something from which to hang your protest banner.

Image via Wikimedia Commons

Religious Reminder for Immigration Zealots

Via Andrew Sullivan, a helpful reminder from all those Christians with their knickers in a bunch about illegal aliens and immigration:

Leviticus 19:33-34 (NIV)

When an alien lives with you in your land, do not mistreat him. The alien living with you must be treated as one of your native-born. Love him as yourself, for you were aliens in Egypt.

Bible burn!

Hayseed Dixie - 'Walk This Way'

The Fart-Catching Blanket

We have too much disposable income in this country.

Offshore Drilling - A Political Lesson

With hundreds of thousands of gallons of oil spreading across the Gulf of Mexico, headed for the American shoreline, those "Drill, baby, drill!" zealots would be hoisted precipitously from their own petards if the Obama administration had stuck to their guns on offshore drilling.

Weeks prior to the oil rig explosion, the President made some comments about how safe offshore drilling had become through technological advancements, and now every right-wing publication imaginable is leveraging this support from the Obama administration as a buffer against the inevitable backlash from environmental groups.

Let's hope that BP is able to repay the billions of dollars it will take to contain and clean up their mess. It would be refreshing if other energy conglomerates pledged funding equal to the final BP tab for research and development of alternative fuel technologies.

I might even buy gasoline from one of them to show my support. Except for Marathon or Speedway. I'm still boycotting them for posting flyers by the pumps advising customers that progressive energy policies would hurt their business model and drive up consumer costs.

For a company that charges $12 for a box of Cap 'N Crunch, it's pretty arrogant to lecture me on Cap and Trade.

The Art of Eating Sunflower Seeds

Instead of embedding this video, I should be starring in it. I go through a bag of David's seeds every two days or so while I'm sitting on boring-ass conference calls.

Enjoy. And remember - you will respect the seed!

Beware of Fake Anti-Virus Software

It's an unwritten rule that you never need anti-virus software until you need it badly. The corollary to that edict is that, being signature based, AV programs are only as good as what they already know, and studies have shown that leading anti-malware offerings fail to detect upwards of 50% of malicious code.

If that isn't enough to make you ponder an existence as an internet hermit, then perhaps the concept of fake anti-virus software will push you over the edge.

Researchers are reporting that increasingly, users are tricked by web site pop-ups and bogus warnings of virus infection detections followed by "suggestions" to download readily-available virus removal programs that are themselves malicious code. Once the user willingly runs the program, their machine is immediately compromised and often proceeds to download additional malcode in the background.

What can you do to protect yourself? Here are a couple of key things to remember.

1. Never, ever install a program or run a command unless you are absolutely certain of its source.
2. Ignore pop-ups, warning banners, and browser redirects. Trust me - the Internet is not one big loving community that exists to help you out. Rely only on warnings from programs you've installed yourself.
3. Always have a rescue CD available for virus removal, and don't be shy about using it if you're concerned. Brian Krebs has an excellent post on finding and using rescue CDs at his Krebs on Security blog.
4. Move off of Internet Explorer. I recommend Firefox with the NoScript add-on, but Google Chrome or Opera are other good options.
5. Keep your computer patched. If you're running Windows, enable automatic updates, and use a free product like Secunia PSI to help keep track of updates to popular applications like Adobe Reader, Sun Java, QuickTime, and other frequently overlooked programs.

Let's be careful out there.

Spock Does The Shocker

Does that make it the Spocker Shocker?

Geekologie

Arizona According to the Daily Show

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Law & Border
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

Bluegrass Cover - 'American Idiot'

Republicans Fold on Financial Reform Filibuster

Maybe it was the threat of having to actually do some filibustering on the Senate floor that convinced them, or perhaps they preferred to attend evening fundraisers with lobbyists pouring champagne over their naked bodies.

Regardless, Senate republicans have folded like a cheap suitcase. I wouldn't be surprised if the real reason turned out to be they were concerned that the public would see the stains on their cots, given they are a bunch of bedwetters.

Steve Stivers Sign Seen From Space

Either this is one of the worst Photoshop efforts in the history of politics, or Steve believes he'll get some coverage from the Hubble space telescope by bringing a massive sign to his rally.

What a maroon.

TPM

Lego Rage

Been there. Done that.

Geekologie

Shitty Deal - The Highlight Reel

Carl Levin knows a shitty deal when he sees one.

Bob Evans Gravy Machine

Hi. I'm the Skeptimist, and I have an unhealthy relationship with Bob Evans sausage gravy.

This doesn't help.

I may put one of these in my car.

Via Geekologie

How I Met Your Motherboard

Pretty funny, and a tad bittersweet.

I fondly recall my Commodore VIC-20 and my Packard-Bell 386 - with its 40 meg hard drive and 1 meg of RAM, all for nearly the same price I paid for my 1984 Ford Escort.

Good times. Good times.


How I Met Your Motherboard

HDTV

Cornbread Red Covers Green Day's 'Boulevard of Broken Dreams'

Hysterical Costco Prank

Polo Assless Chaps, anyone?

How about a Vinyl Dungeon Restraint System?

Stocked up on Poo Pills?

Seems the gang at Cockeyed.com noticed that Costco goes pretty low-end on their signage, what with keeping up the illusion of an actual warehouse - albeit one that hands out chicken chunks and cheesy poofs.

Since pranks are what they do, man, they printed up some price labels of their own and strategically placed them in assorted Costco stores. Hilarity ensured.

Warning - do not purchase the Poo Pills if you're going to wear the Assless Chaps. Trust me on this one.

KFC Double Down Chart - How Many DDs in Your Lunch Choice?

With all the outrage (real and faux) over the KFC Double Down, let's see where the typical American lunch offering falls within the chart of shame.

I'm actually in pretty good shape, relatively speaking. The only two death-wiches on the list that I eat regularly are the Chick-Fil-A chicken sammich and the Wendy's Spicy Chicken (which I get with lettuce and onion only).

I'm suddenly more confident that I'll survive at least until the end of the month.

Via Geekologie

Man Hides From Cops in Vat of Poo

Don't do the crime if you can't do the slime.

Don't do it.

In Noble County, Indiana, Thomas Hovis Jr. decided that concealing himself in a vat of dog dukey was his best shot at freedom. Wanted on warrants that included methamphetamine and weapons charges, Hovis eluded a SWAT team and spent nearly an hour in the poop pit.

What's more, when pulled from the dog pile, Hovis resisted and was summarily stunned by a Taser before being taken into custody. Suffering from crap-induced hypothermia, Hovis was trembling so much that he required medical treatment. No word on whether that included a heartworm biscuit and testing for Parvo.

Hiding in a liquid manure pit may not seem like a good idea for everyone, which is probably as it should be. For Hovis, however, being in deep shit is all part of the game.

Police Sniff Out Meth Suspect's Manure Hideout

'The Simpsons' Supports South Park

Via The Daily Dish

Teacher Fail

Yeah, but all means, let's rally to save the teachers so that we can continue to deliver results like these.

Way to go, Iowa.

Stuf U Learn In Pubic Schools

Old Jews Telling Jokes - Fruit Store

Dumbpiphany

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Honeywagon Covers Rolling Stones 'Wild Horses'

Stomach Cake

Lunchbreath's photostream on flickr